I have some delayed onset muscles soreness today. My lats; otherwise known as the armpit muscle is really tender. My abs are also kind of sore. My legs feel fine, my sister said her legs are sore but she doesn't exercise at all so I guess I shouldn't be surprised.

Last night I went to the gym and ran on the treadmill. It was almost 80 here and I hate running when it is that hot. I did three miles on the TM but instead of focusing on the time, I based everything off of .5 mile increments. I ran for a half mile, took a 2 minute walk break then ran until the next .5 mile mark. The time went by much faster. I also brought my kindle in and watched "Spirit of the Marathon" I think music would make me run faster but the movie really helped with the determination. It really is a great one. An older lady got on to the TM next to me to run so I had to race her. I am pretty sure I won since she got off the TM before me




I don't have a lot planned for this weekend. I have had a really hard time waking up the last two days so I am hoping I can sleep in a little. Doubtful this will happen. I want to go by Target to see about getting some fitted cotton shorts or capris for ballet and a yoga mat. Maybe check out Marshall's or Gordman's while I am out. There is a 7 mile run on tap sometime and dinner with the in-laws Easter Sunday.

Oh and last but not least...I got my mid-year review yesterday. I was told that I was doing a great job is it any wonder this place drives me nuts?

My first aerial ballet class

OMG, the class was so much fun!! 

I started to get really nervous and read everything I could find on the class when I got home from work.  I saw something I had never noticed before, it said not to wear slick clothing that it was better to wear cotton.  Well, as most runners will tell you 'cotton is rotten' it doesn't wick moisture and can cause chaffing so I just don't buy it.  So I was supposed to wear something tight fitting that wasn't slick.  Well that wasn't going to happen.  I ended up wearing one of my running skirts that has a thicker kind of textured capris under it and a tighter t-shirt.

Since I hadn't been there before I left my house kind of early and got to the studio 30 minutes early.  I tried to not think about it so I wouldn't freak out and leave.  When my sister got there we went inside and did the nervous waiting thing since we don't know the other students.  Turns out they are all super nice but you know how that awkward who are you kind of thing works.

We started the class with some stretching.  Turns out this is done on a very hard wooden dance floor and my knee was not going to let me do that.  I did the best I could and asked if I could bring a yoga mat the next time.  She said to bring a pillow if I needed to.

After the stretching she went over some conditioning exercises; superman, plank, head stands against the wall, bicycles, push ups...There were 5 people in the class and only two silks so we had to take turns.  The first thing we did was just a regular foot wrap.  You wrap one leg around the silk and kind of step on that foot with your free foot.  I got up but I couldn't "climb" because that would mean having to unwrap the foot and climbing with my arms.  I couldn't get that down at all.  We practiced it for a few minutes then switched.  There are two girls in the class that are amazing!!  They take the class 3 time a week and made us 3 beginners both want to kill them and be just like them.  Of course they are also 15 years old, which doesn't hurt.  It was really hard to concentrate on conditioning and not just watch them with your jaw on the floor. 

On our next turn she taught us another position that she called the foot taco.  On this one you step down on the silk with one foot and wrap the silk around with the other foot.  This is by far my favorite!!  I actually took three "steps" and made it almost to the top of the silk!!  I couldn't wait to get down and try it again.  But of course I had to share so we went back to the floor. 

On our next turn we did something called a foot lock.  I can't even explain how to do this.  You are supposed to wrap the silk with one foot and then use your other foot to kind of tie a knot around your foot.  She had to put me in this one because I couldn't get my monkey toes to work right.  Once she got me in the foot lock though I could have hung there all day.  The tricky part is undoing the knot and redoing it.  That, of course didn't happen.  She helped me get in a foot lock with both of my feet and do some kind of contortionist move, kind of like a Russian split.  Once I was in the position she asked me if I felt comfortable letting go and hanging upside down.  I asked her if she had been using crack long, maybe next time.

Before we left she asked me and my sister if we wanted to try anything else.  My sister was done, she was exhausted but I wanted to try one more thing before I left, I was having a blast.  She got me in a double foot lock and had me do the splits!!!  I was up there long enough for my sister to get her phone and take pictures.  I got a standing ovation and I was so freaking happy about actually being able to do some kind of trick!!

The best part is, I feel so good.  I am not sore like I thought I would be and my legs fell so loose.  My back has been hurting for 3 weeks but today is much better.  This is the best cross training ever.

Something to remember for next week....clip and file toenails so they don't snag the silk.  A pedicure would definitely be a good thing.

Here is the picture my sister took of me in the splits.

This is what it is supposed to look like

This is what the teacher was trying to have me let go and do. 

I can't wait until next week!!

 

history report

I really don’t have a lot going on right now so I thought I would share some random fact about myself that I am sure you were just dying to know.  Feel free to hum “getting to know you” to yourself as you read.

I am the middle child with two sisters.  If middle child syndrome is supposed to mean you feel invisible most of your life then I had it.  My parents are still together and will celebrate their 50^th anniversary in a few years.  They all drive me crazy but that is what family is for.  My little sister and I call my dad a manorexic.  He gets on diet kicks and loses so much that he looks sick.  The last time he did this he actually passed out while he was walking down the hall.  He was told he had diabetes a few years back but obviously he has it controlled by his diet.  He is pretty healthy overall.  My mom is obese and in denial.  She thinks she can wear clothes a lot smaller then she really can.  She too was diagnosed with diabetes but thinks that taking a pill means she can eat whatever she wants.  She was diagnosed with colon cancer last summer and had 6 months of chemo.  My biggest fear is that I will turn into my mom.  She is such a negative person, it makes me sad and I just don’t want to be that person.  Nothing ever makes her happy.

My little sister and I get along ok.  She is 4 years younger than me and was a model when she was younger.  That’s always a fun thing to grow up with.  Growing up she had really bad emotional problems.  I don’t remember what that steamed from but I will get to that later. 

My older sister is crazy.  Most of my memories of her from growing up were of her being drunk or on drugs and my mom being worried sick.  She kind of likes to pretend that none of us exist unless she wants us for something, and that is rare.  She is embarrassed by our parents and rarely has any contact with them.  She came to the hospital once when my mom was in the hospital having cancer surgery and never came and helped while she was getting chemo. 

I don’t remember a lot about my childhood.  I have a few significant things that stick out, like when my uncle was attacked by his ex-wife and almost killed, she slit his throat.  I remember sleeping with the covers over my head because I was afraid she would come and cut my throat in my sleep.  I might have been 5 at the time.  I took dance lessons until I was a teenager but I don’t remember anyone from my dance classes.  I have had people come up to my mom and me at a store and remember us from dance and I don’t have a clue who they are.  I don’t have many memories of school either.  I didn’t really have friends at school; I just kind of hid out at lunch.  I don’t think I was unpopular or anything, I just never felt like I belonged.  I spent a lot of time with my maternal grandmother and most of my memories growing up revolve around her.  I was her shadow.  She was almost 6 feet tall with red hair and I wanted to be just like her when I grew up.  She remains one of the strongest people I have ever met.  She battled Lupus and Scleroderma for the last ten years of her life.  I spent most of my weekends with her because I knew she would not be around long and I wanted to be with her as much as I possibly could.  OK, I am going to cry, she died when I was 16, next subject. 

I think that my eating issues were my way of dealing with loneliness and sadness from all of the things above combined.

I can honestly say that college was amazing for me.  I loved it.  I finally had friends for the first time in my life.  I had so much fun and enjoyed the freedom of being “on my own”.  I was one of the geeks that lived in the dorms until I graduated.  There was a 21 and over coed dorm and we had so much fun.  I still keep in touch with most of the people that lived in Haskell Hall.

I got a job working for the Corps of Engineers and started working for them two days after college graduation.  I was a park ranger for 6 years.  This is how I met Dennis.  He was working as a highway patrol officer at the time.  We met in a park called Afton Landing, some crazy lady was throwing everything out of her camping trailer into a camp fire. 

My dogs are my kids.  I was never really a dog person at all.  We had dogs growing up but they weren’t mine and I was never the kind of kid that asked for a puppy for Christmas.  Hunter changed my life when I found him running around a park when I was a ranger.  Because of him I am a much more compassionate person.  

OK, I guess that is enough for now.  For someone who didn’t have anything to say I sure as heck filled up a page!! 

lazy bones

I am feeling a little blah today.  I am sure it is from being inactive for a week.  My knee feels better and you can actually see where the bruise is draining down my leg (a nice long streak of bluish green).  It is only tender where I actually fell.  So I am going to aerial ballet with my sister tomorrow.  I have never been more intimidated by a class.  As a matter of fact just writing about it is giving me a mini panic attack.  Yeah it is good to do things that scare you but to be honest, I would not go if my sister wasn't going.  I am freaking out about what to wear, will I be strong enough to lift myself on the silks, will I embarrass myself so bad that I will have to move and change my name?  I guess I will find out soon.  Probably wouldn't be a bad idea to make an appointment with the chiropractor for Thursday.

Even food just isn't doing it for me today.  My friend brought in more pb eggs and I picked one up and thought gosh, that really isn't worth 90 calories and the horrible feeling I will get after the initial euphoria wears off.  I guess the key part being I put it back and didn't eat it.

For those of you interested in the story about my friends that did the ultra marathon in a blizzard here is a blink to my good friend trail zombie's blog.  TZ Blog He is an amazing runner, coach, blogger and an all around good guy and friend.  Him and his wife put on some amazing races, including the Snake Run that nearly crippled me.  Here is a link to the news story that was on last night.  New footage

I don't really have a lot to say but wanted to check in. 

weekend update

I didn't run the 10K Saturday.  I met up with my mom for lunch and some shopping and she had a conniption when she saw my knee.  She said she was afraid I would get a blood clot from it if I ran.  Not only that but she wouldn't even go to the mall with me because she didn't want me walking around on it.  When I got home I was telling Dennis about how ridiculous my mom was being and he said that he didn't think I should run either.  Well FINE.  I will show them.  I will stay home, not run and eat all weekend.  I went straight to the super indulgent cookie bakery and bought a dozen iced sugar cookies, so there.  Why do we do this to ourselves?

I also shopped all weekend long.  I bought a new Coach purse and matching wallet.  This is why I NEED to run.  I can't be trusted with free time.  I could be in so much debt if I let myself.  And we got news that the furloughs were postponed so we will get at least another full paycheck in May.  I seriously don't see this happening at all but I am not real happy about being a pawn for the politicians.

I had several friends that went to Kansas for an ultra marathon over the weekend.  Some were doing the 50 miler, some the 100 miler.  They knew there was a chance for some winter weather but, ya know, you have been training for the race for months.  They caravan to Ottawa Kansas and start out on a very cold morning.  The first night looked brutal but do-able.  The poor people running the 100 miler weren't so lucky.  A blizzard blew in and in a short amount of time they couldn't see the trail and the prints of the person they were following were covered and they were not sure if they were even on the trial anymore.  They ended up calling the race at 5:00 am and tried to get everyone off the trail.  I say try because there were some people that had gotten lost and were trapped out in the snow.  Others were stranded in cars and trucks with all the surrounding highways shut down.  This is what they posted on facebook...

On Saturday March 23rd, seventeen members of Tatur Racing set out on a 100 mile or 50 mile trail race in which blizzard and white-out conditions became worse and worse. Some were stranded for hours in freezing weather, others had their vehicles stuck in snow drifts for hours, some were physically pulled from the course due to the danger and others were able to finish this grueling race in impossible conditions. The latest reports are that they all survived with no major injuries. There will be some incredible coming out of this. Stay tuned.

I told them that this would be an amazing premise for a Stephen King novel except no one would believe there are people out there that would run knowing that there was a chance of a blizzard.  I have some pretty crazy friends.  One of them has an  amazing blog and when he thaws out enough to post a race report I will link it so you can see just how nuts they are.  There are also going to be news reports on it.  I will share those as well.

I really have to start focusing on my smiley face days.  I am so used to not getting them that it doesn't even bother me that much anymore.  I had a dream last night that one of the girls at work was going to go to the donut shop and wanted to know what I wanted.  I told her I wanted a Pepsi.  She brought me back a chocolate donut.  So of course when I woke up this morning all I could think about was that chocolate donut.  So I stopped and got one one the way to work.  I don't even really weigh anymore.  My scales at home are jacked so I just threw them away.  But, on my shopping spree over the weekend I ordered new scales from groupon that have the body fat and hydration percentages.  Maybe that will help me get myself back under control. 

Friday, I thought you would never get here!!

I got Libby Lou taken back to the vet yesterday.  They did a platelet count and decided that she doesn't have an active infection, therefore we can take her off the horrible antibiotics.  She is on an OTC heart burn medication to try and get her stomach under control.  24 hours without medication and she was already acting better and wanting some treats.  She was such a angel at the vet.  She usually gets all hyper in public and embarrasses the crap out of me but she remembered her basic obedience training perfectly and made me proud.  Makes me wish she didn't have knee problems so I could run with her.  She is so gorgeous, she would look so pretty with her long blond hair blowing in the breeze!

I went to the grocery store last night and picked up some random things to cook in the crock pot.  I mixed up beef tips, cream of mushroom soup, onion, garlic, and Worcestershire sauce.  It probably would have been good with some mushrooms but I didn't get any and didn't have any in the house.  I got some egg noodles to put it over.  We will see how that turns out.  It is cooking as I type.  I also picked up most of the stuff for chicken burritos.  I can mix it up and get it ready over the weekend and fix it early next week.

I also picked up some lemons for my new water bottle.  I really like it and I have gotten a lot of comments on it.  It looks really cool!!

It took me half a lemon to figure it out (never claimed to be the sharpest knife in the drawer) but I got it set up.  You screw off the bottom part and put ice in it.  Then you put the juicer part over the bottom of the bottle (remembering to leave the top on - which I didn't the first time, doh) and juice the fruit into the bottle.  Screw the bottom back on and fill it up with water.  I am on my second bottle of the morning and I am still using the same lemon half.  I also have some cuties, clementine oranges that I might try this afternoon.  

Tomorrow is the Race to the Well 10K.  It is supposed to be really cold and pouring rain.  Should make for an interesting run.  I might see if I can switch to the 5K.  Heck I could just do the 5K and I still wouldn't have to worry about screwing with the race results.  The fast people will have finished the 10K before I get to the turn around, lol.

Oh, and I got my smiley face yesterday.  I have no choice but to make today a smiley day since I accidentally put the sticker on the wrong day at first.  Again, never claimed I was smart.  

OK, I am going to organize my desk today before it gets out of control.  Everyone pretty much cleared the day for the furlough meetings and they postponed it two weeks.  I just wish they would make a decision and stick with it already!!

 

Friday Eve

1.  Remember me telling y'all about how my big girl wasn't taking her medication?  I finally figured out that McD's chicken nuggets worked like a charm, she ate the medicine like a champ.  Well yesterday as we were eating dinner she puked all over my living room.  I suspected this might be the case.  I called the vet this morning and they are going to do blood work-up to see if we need to continue the medication and add nausea medication or if we can safely take her off the antibiotic. 

2.  My sister went to the aerial ballet class and she said it was so freaking hard!!  She took this picture of the students practicing and sent it to me.  She said she was the "fattest person in the class" and that her entire body was shaking when she left.  I really hope my knee is better so I can go next week.

3.  I took a rest day yesterday and I enjoyed it so much that I was two hours late for work this morning because I couldn't get out of bed...well, I could I just chose not to.  I took a muscle relaxer because my back and knee hurt and I always get kind of hang over from them. Tonight I am going to do the recumbent bike for 30 minutes instead of running.  If my back starts to hurt I will cut it short.  I will probably take Friday off since I am doing the 10K on Saturday.

4.  I burned my lunch IN THE MICROWAVE, now that is talent.  Luckily one of my co-workers was going out and she picked me up a kids meal.  When I tell people at work that I can't cook, they believe me now.

5.  Speaking of cooking, I want to make something in the crock pot, any ideas?  Keep in mind it has to be SIMPLE and require basic ingredients.  I need to get on amazon and see if I can come up with a cheap and easy cook book for the kindle.

6.  Today is cake day at work for March birthday's.  And I was on my way to a smiley face day, even with the kids meal. Maybe they will get a chocolate cake or a cake with whipped icing, I don't like either of those and won't waste the calories for it.

7.  I got my citrus zinger water bottle in the mail but I don't have any lemons or limes so I will have to pick some up tonight and try it out tomorrow.

8.  I wasn't on the news after all!!  Well technically I was on the news but it was me getting measured and it just showed my shirt.  No one would know that was me if you didn't know what I was wearing.  I was really worried about it.

9. I drank a root beer this morning.  I did get the small 8oz cans so at least I am not sucking down an extra large take out drink.

10.  We are supposed to get our furlough letters tomorrow.  I really don't think it will happen and honestly I don't need the reduction in pay but an extra day off a week sounds hella nice.  They are required to give us 30 days notice but just because we are getting the letters doesn't mean we will get furloughed.  It will probably go right up to the night before and they will come to an agreement.  Ya know, because it isn't like they are messing with peoples lives and stuff.

Ask me about my boobs

Well, I went to the Ladies Night/bra fitting at "my" running store yesterday.  There was a great turn out.  There were reps from two running companies there fitting bras and a lot of women who wanted to be fit, the line was incredibly long.  I stood in line next to one of my aqua jogging buddies and we talked about our weight loss journey (she looks amazing btw and is the running ambassador for Lulumon athletics - way hard core).  Apparently there was a news crew setting up that over heard the conversation and asked me to be on the news....WHHHAAAA?  What the hell.  So they filmed me talking about bras and supporting the girls.  Keep in mind this was after a very hard 2 mile run with my hair pinned back because I can't stand hair in my eyes when I run.  I really hope no one sees it.  On the other hand I did find a new sports bra that I really liked and can't wait to try out.

Back to the run.  It was probably one of the hardest runs I have made myself do in a long time.  At first I planned to run with my friend at work but I knew that I couldn't keep up.  Since I was going to the running store right by the river trail I decided I had no excuse but to run there.  I had intended to do 3 miles but I just didn't have it in me.  My knee hurt,

my legs were tired, and worse of all, my lungs were on fire.  I can work with tired and sore legs, but if I can't get my breathing regulated in 2 miles it just isn't going to happen.  I had to keep reminding myself that I did a 9 mile trail run 2 days before, this was a recovery run and I didn't have to beat any time or distance, and not every run can be a good one.  I had to follow my own advice and just put in some miles even if it means walking most of it.  I do feel a little less stiff this morning.  But, it really made me doubt my ability to do a 10K on Saturday.  At least it isn't until 5pm.

My little sister sent me an email yesterday with this link....aerial ballet asking me if I want to take classes with her.  I told her that I would, it sounds like fun.  I get a text this morning that she is going to class TONIGHT.  I told her that I am in no condition to do this right now but I would love to join her next week.  She is going to go tonight and let me know what it is like.  I am not sure what kind of crazy I am turning into, I have no upper body strength and I am scared of heights.  We will see.  I promised her I would try it so I will go once no matter what.

Food has really been bad lately.  Yesterday it was potato chips up until time for our weekly staff meeting.  One of my co-workers brought in peanut butter eggs!!!  So my smiley face was hijacked.  That is ok because if the pb eggs hadn't taken mr. smiley glacier confections at the running store would have gotten it.  I hate/love Easter.

Then after a new found resolve when I woke up this morning another coworker walks in with this...

for the first day of spring.  It is pound cake on the bottom, vanilla ice cream, and oreo cookie crumbs.  I say that since it was a gift and I couldn't turn it down that it shouldn't count against my smiley face for the day.  Yes, I did eat some of it but it would have been rude not to.  It was almost forced on me against my will.  I only ate a little bit, enough to find the hidden worm

and put the rest in the freezer to take home to Dennis.  He loves ice cream, I could take it or leave it.  My running partner said NO SMILEY FACE but I told her I was going to ask you guys and see what you think, lol.

My stubborn bull headed dog with the tick disease is refusing to take her medication.  I put it in a pill pocket yesterday and she oh so gently walked up to me and spit it back out into my hand....not once but three times.  I gave it to Dennis and told him to get the pill down his girls throat.  Her second pill was given in peanut butter and she was pissed off beyond belief.  So much so that she refused to come in last night and slept outside.  This morning when I tried to give her the pill in a pill pocket she refused to open her mouth.  I pried her mouth open and put the pill in and she literally spit it across the room.  It took me two more tries before I think she got it down.  I am trying to decide if I should call the vet and see if maybe the medicine is making her sick and see if we can change it or try it in some raw meat.  Libby is just not a food motivated dog and if she isn't hungry she has no desire to eat anything, so not like her mom.  She is going to mess around and have to go back to the vet for IV medication.  No way I am going to let this disease kill her but I just might if she doesn't straighten up! I am such a bad dog mom!!

I need a nap

After getting out of bed and moving around for a little while yesterday I realized I felt like I had been hit by a truck.  Sunday's run was a lot harder on me then I realized.  Not only that, but I am just tired, like I am out of breathe just walking into the office and want to sit down and rest TIRED.  That makes this evenings run with the fast and young girl from work seem like torture.  I could totally use my knee as an excuse to get out of it but I won't.  I will just be a quarter of a mile behind her. 

Eating was way out of control yesterday.  I didn't eat dinner Sunday night so I woke up starving on Monday.  I stopped at Sonic on my way to work and got a jr. burger (I don't like breakfast food).  I ate about half of it, which is odd because I normally have a lot of problems with hamburgers.  I had a 100 calorie pack of chocolate covered pretzels for a snack and a half a turkey sandwich for lunch.  About 2 I was starving again and looking for anything that wasn't tied down.  I found mint M&M's that I had hid from myself and ate some of those.  When I got home from work I discovered that Dennis had bought some cookies at the grocery store over the weekend.  They aren't cookies I like so it normally isn't a problem but yesterday I ate them anyway.  Dennis was late getting home and I didn't want to cook anything just for me so I made nachos (my weakness) and went to town.  Man they were good. 

My scales are broken and have been for awhile but I got on them anyway and it said 114.4.  I was shocked after all the madness of the day before.  I weighed when I got to work; of course with clothes on and after drinking water and eating a fiber one bar, and I was at 113.5.  Maybe my body just needed calories? 

I really am trying to stay away from low quality calories.  I am detoxing off of root beer and drinking water with lots of lemon instead.  So maybe that had something to do with the downward movement in the scale?  I do know that I wasn't drinking enough water and the kidney stone just reassured me of that.  I used to drink 3 liters of water a day before I left work but I got out of that habit when my band got too tight, making it difficult to just swallow that much water.  I am not measuring it now, just trying to drink as much as I can.

I ordered my smiley face reward yesterday - even though yesterday was far from a smiley face day.  I ordered something called a citrus zinger, this should help with my water consumption.

you put a lemon or lime on the juicer thing and fill it up with water.  One half of the fruit is supposed to last for two fills.  I should get it in the mail tomorrow so I will see how well it works.

My friend that took pictures from Sunday posted more pictures.  I think this is hands down my favorite

Trail Running

I decided to skip the 5K on Saturday.  There were so many people there and I had a lot of stuff that needed to get done since I wasn't able to do anything Thursday as planned.  Most of my friends PRed on the race Saturday so I am a little upset that I didn't try but I think I made the right choice.

The 3 hour (or 6 hour) snake run was Sunday and I decided to focus on that.  I am sure I have explained this before but in case you missed it, this is a trail run but instead of setting the distance, you sign up for either 3 or 6 hours and you run as far as you can in that time limit.  The trail is an out and back that is 4.2 miles.  There is also a .25 mile trail that you can run around if you don't have enough time to do the entire big loop before the time limit you can get extra miles in on the small loop.

The race itself was fun.  I learned a lot about trail running.
1.  Despite what you learn in road running, don't look up.
2  Without looking up you have to also look for other runners, tree limbs, and other various obstacles and trail markers.
3.  Rocks, roots, tree limbs, water crossings SUCK
4.  It is not easy to get 400 runners on a path that will only accomadate one person at a time.
5.  Picking your feet up is not an option.  Shuffling doesn't work too well.

But, I really did have a great time.  I was initiated into the trail running club by taking a spill on my last loop.  I have a nasty bruise and knot on my knee.  I am so proud.  There were a few guys that witnessed it and came to help me but jumped up and yelled "I'm officially a trail runner now!!"

HMF was at the trail run doing the 6 hour run.  Of course I saw her several times.  I stopped to talk to her at a wide spot in the trail.  It was all about her, and even though she knew I was sent to the ER Thursday morning, she never asked how I was feeling or anything.  It shouldn't surprise me I guess.

I ended up doing about 9 miles in 2 hours and 45 minutes.  I could have done another little loop or two but I was tired and starving.  So I turned in my chip, got my medal and met Dennis for lunch.  I ate almost all of my chicken nachos with no regrets.  They were so freaking good.

The first picture is my battle wound and the medal.  The second picture is at the aid station right after I fell.  The last picture is this morning.  It is getting more impressive as time goes on!!

I think I would do another trial run, as long as it is easy trails.  I enjoyed it and it is a nice change.  I also forget how nice runner are.  Everyone is so supportive no matter if you are in the fast group or the slow group. 

This weekend is the 10K.  After that I should have a break for a few weeks.  My next big run will be Joplin half in May. 

Just when you think you are at your limit

Let me tell ya, it has been an interesting week. Best laid plans and all.

Wednesday I had a really good run with co-worker Kim.  My fastest unofficial 5K ever at 37:37!!  I almost ran the entire thing with splits under 12.  I just ran out of steam the last quarter mile.  It was hot and did I mention that Kim is 13 years younger and 5 inches taller than me?  Not sure what I was thinking when we started running together.  After the run I was sure that I would do the run on Saturday in record time.

Later that night my back was getting a little achy.  I attributed that to the run and didn't think much about it.

Thursday morning at 3am I woke up with what I thought was a catch in my side.  I went to the living room to lay in my chair and see if I could get it worked out.  It only got worse.  I woke Dennis up and told him that I was pretty sure I needed to go to the ER.  He told me that he thought I should wait a little longer and see if it went away.  I waited about 30 minutes then started to get dressed.  I woke him up and told him either he was taking me to the ER or I was driving on my own.  At that point I was positive my appendix had burst because the pain was so freaking bad.  It was like nothing I had ever felt before.

I couldn't sit still on the car ride and Dennis almost had to carry me in, I was in so much pain.  I love how they always want you to fill out paperwork when you are doubled over in agony.  They put me in a room and had me hooked up to monitors to take my vitals, the guy was getting the IV stared when the doctor came in and told them to give me a morphine shot in my IV before they had even finished the work-up.  The doctor did a quick exam and told us that he was 99.9% sure that it was a kidney stone.  Let me just say that morphine is amazing.  Within 5 minutes the pain was either gone or I was, I didn't care either way.  Awesome stuff.  I don't remember anything after the shot except trying to text message my boss and not being able to see the screen on my phone.

The radiology guy came in and took me to have a CT.  I have no idea what happened, I was stoned out of my mind.  I know Dennis tried to go with me but they wouldn't let him.  The doctor confirmed that there was a stone and it had already moved to my bladder so the worse was over.  Dennis said that I was starting to feel some pain as they were getting ready to dismiss me and I demanded another shot before I would leave.  They gave me something that was a little longer lasting on top of the other happy drug I had gotten.

Dennis wanted to know if I wanted him to take off work but I told him no I would probably just sleep.  He got me tucked in and left for work.  I slept until 9.  I felt drunk until about 5 yesterday evening.  I had a script I needed filled and the two doctor's appointments that I was supposed to go to yesterday.  Dennis took my car keys because he was afraid that in my drunken haze I would get the crazy idea that I could go to my appointments. I was a good girl and called an cancelled.

So, no band doctor or eye doctor yesterday.  I called and cancelled my hair appointment for this evening too. 

Now I have to decide if I want to do the 5K tomorrow.  I felt great this morning, but as the day goes on I am starting to feel a little run down and like I did a hard core workout last night.  I am not expecting any PR's if I do run.  I probably won't make up my mind until I wake up tomorrow.

Needless to say I got smiley faces for not eating junk....well at least that I remember. 

cheating?

Yesterday was technically a smiley face day, but I didn't give myself the sticker.  I didn't stress eat at work, which is my trouble time, usually if I can make it through work I am golden.  But yesterday I got a call about 2:30 from our vet saying that Libby (see old blog for details) my dogs  tested positive for something called ehrlichiosis, a tick borne illness.  Of course I immediately look it up on the internet and it says in neon flashing letters (ok maybe not, but it sure felt like it) that this could be fatal.  I tried really hard not to stress too much, you know how the interwebs love to exaggerate and make everyone with a cold think they have a brain tumor.  I took off work an hour early to go to the doctor and pick up her medication and talk to the doctor.  They said that this disease is rarely ever fatal but she could show some symptoms kind of like leukemia but even that was unlikely.  She is on a month long round of antibiotics.

On the way home I started to get that adrenaline dump from the freak out.  I had to stop at the drug store to pick some stuff up and got 3 hershey bars 3/$1, but they were on sale!!  I ate one before I even left the parking lot.  So technically I could say that it was a smiley day since I didn't eat shit at work but I really went for it later.  Maybe I need to expand my smiley day rules.  The remaining chocolate was given to Dennis and is out of my house. 

As if that wasn't bad enough Dennis brought home the greasiest cheesiest pizza in the history of pizza.  I blotted it 3 times and it was still swimming in grease.  Man it was good.  I could only manage one piece and I didn't force it.  I am kind of surprised I could eat that much!


So I know I am pretty much either first or last one to catch on to a fad.  I decided it was time I come out of the stone age and buy a crock pot.  Yes, I went my entire adult life living on my own without one.   I hate to cook though so I didn't see the need for one.  I bought some soup from the pre-made frozen dinner place and it said you can either put it in a crock pot or cock it in a sauce pan.  I caved and bought a crock pot because I am too lazy to stand over the pan, lol if it wasn't true.  So I put the soup in the crock pot when I went home at lunch to give Libby her medication.  I am kind of nervous that my house will burn down.  I know that people use them all the time without any problems but those people are not me.  Seriously if it can go wrong it will happen to me.  I will let you know how it turns out.

The rest of my week is going to be a blur....
Tomorrow - taking off half a day to get my eyes checked, get glasses, see Dr. A, need to find some green socks to wear Saturday
Friday - hair day!!!
Saturday - 5K and nails
Sunday - 3 hour Snake Run.  The trail is 4.2 miles, I hope to get two laps done in 3 hours.  I'm not sure how it will go since I have never done an actual trail run before.  I hope I don't fall and hurt myself.

Food has been OK today.  I polished off the last of the peanut butter, there wasn't much there.  I forgot my lunch at home and I had a meeting so I ended up eating two Bueno tacos.  My snack was a 100 calorie bag of chocolate pretzels (totally doesn't count towards my smiley).  Tonight we will eat the chicken and wild rice soup that may or may not be simmering in the crock pot.  I will also go for a 3 mile run tonight so that should help with the tacos that were not planned.  At least my stomach is back to normal.

changes

I am starting to feel a little claustrophobic in my life, does that make sense?  I need to make some changes but I am not sure where to start.  I am sure a lot of it has to do with the stress of work, the unknowns about furloughs, my mom being sick...it all adds up.  I can't decide if the going back to school thoughts are making that worse or better.

Sometimes a small change helps so I am going to start by getting my hair done on Friday and I am going to go back to my usual, unusual self.  I have held off because Dennis really doesn't like when I do crazy stuff to my hair and I get the "I'm too old for that" feelings but to hell with it.

These pictures are from the stylist's facebook and is kind of what I want to do.  Of course I will keep the main color of my hair red.

I have also held off because there was a position opening up as a coordinator for all the Air Force work but with the feedback I have gotten lately it is evident they already have the selection made.  Screw it.

So how old is too old to do something fun like this to your hair?  At what age do you take out the funky rook and tragus ear piercings and start acting like an adult?  I'm not sure I want to be that age.

Ok, enough of that.

I didn't run last night.  I just don't think I got enough calories and/or fluids to make for an even alright run.  I took a friend out to lunch for her birthday yesterday and I ate maybe a quarter of a cup of chicken tortilla soup.  About 3 I started to get light headed and went to the vending machine and got a hershey bar (obviously relinquishing my smiley face for the day, maybe even week).  I had muscle cramps from not drinking enough water but I was afraid to do anything but sip at my water bottle after Sunday.  I hope to get some cardio in today but if it is tomorrow before my body feels up to it then so be it.  I don't want to push it and either hurt myself or mentally break down and not want to do the races I have signed up for the rest of the month. 

Thursday I have to go back to the band doctor.  I'm curious to see what he says.  My weight is still right around the 115 range.  Not sure what it is about 112 that sounds so appealing but that is where I WANT to be.  3 pounds shouldn't have that much effect on a person but it does.  My appointment is at 5 and they are having a seminar at 6.  Dr. A asked me to stay and speak to the people at the seminar.  Why not.  I don't feel much like a good example but looking back on the pictures I know that I have come a really long way.

On a funny note, my sister is one of those strange 'I believe in aliens and astrological chart people'.  I asked her to do my chart before I decided to go back to school for sure.  She sent me a text back almost immediately and told me she could tell me right off that this year I was going to feel attacked at all angles.  I almost laughed out loud.  Maybe there is something to the chart thing.
 

swollowing cement

Yesterday I had the worst stuck episode of my banded life!!  It was horrible.  I wanted to die. 

Since Dennis has been busy working with his ham radio buddies all week, he promised that we would spend Sunday together, go to lunch, maybe a movie...a regular date day.

Well I had been having bad food days all weekend long.  Nothing was getting stuck but I just couldn't seem to eat more than 4 bites of anything.  I thought that by Sunday I would be hungry and could eat like a normal bandster.  NOPE.  We ended up going to Texas Roadhouse and I got smothered chicken, which I have gotten before and haven't had problems with.  I cut up little bites, ate slow, chewed well.  I guess there was a rouge mushroom or something because we didn't get very far from the restaurant and I had to have Dennis pull over.  I hate doing that because it really makes him feel bad and I feel bad because he bought me a nice lunch, lol.

So we pull over and I think I feel better.  Our first stop was to get dog food.  I had to make another trip to the porcelain god.  Again, I thought I felt better.  We stopped at the pharmacy to pick up some KT tape that was on sale and I again had to puke.  I got some gum because I knew for sure I had puke breath.  Another stop for Dennis, I didn't think I would be able to make it, I guess it was the gum but I felt like I had been stabbed in the stomach.  I stayed in the car while he did whatever he had to do so he would see me walk around to the side of the building and this time I think for sure it is all out.  I don't see how I could have anything left.  I took a drink on our way to the last place we needed to stop and had to pull over again because the liquid wasn't going down.  By this time Dennis was asking if I was sure I didn't want to go to the ER and have fluid taken out.

We ate at noon and I didn't get unstuck until about 4!!  I wanted to cut myself open and take the crap out myself.  It hurt so freaking bad.  I tried to drink some G2 and water the rest of the day but I seriously had to sip it.  This morning wasn't much better but it has gotten better as the day went on. 

But, overall it was a good weekend.  I had a sinus headache facial on Saturday, which helped with the headaches I have been having. 

No running over the weekend.  I got up on Saturday and went outside to gauge the temperature to see how to dress and the wind was 20+mph and there was smoke from a grass fire in the air.  With the headaches I had been having I decided to take a weekend off since I have a 5K on Saturday and the 3 or 6 hour Snake run on Sunday....if the trail isn't muddy.  Next Saturday is Race to the Well 10K.  I figured I wouldn't have any trouble making up miles over the next few weekends.  BTW I still haven't signed up for the Snake Run.  It rained really hard on Saturday and was drizzly yesterday.  I have never done a trail run and I really don't want to do my first one in the mud.  I will go out there and if it isn't muddy sign up, if it is I will help out with timing or an aid station.  I plan on doing that after my 3 hour run is over anyway. 

The lady I have been talking to about the nutrition program at Oklahoma State told me that Kansas State has an online dietetics degree.  It isn't cheap, like $400 an hour, so I will have to find some kind of financial aid.  I will also need to take an HAP class and maybe biology before I can apply.  If I can take it online through our local community college I will probably just go ahead and take them both in the fall.  I have had lots of biology but it was all environmental, not like regular biology.  It can only help me I think and I like that type of thing anyway.  So it is looking like I will have to wait until Spring semester to apply, but I am going to call or email and make sure there is nothing else I need to do.  The only thing that is really freaking me out at this point (besides the possibility of  having to take organic chemistry) is the 1200 hours of internship time required to be an RD.  That will have to be done before I can start the Master's program.  I am trying to take it one step at a time.

I hope to get a run in today but it kind of depends on how the food situation goes today.  As of right now I am starving.  I plan on sticking with mushy and liquids for a few days until my stomach isn't so freaked out.  If I can't get enough calories in I will wait until tomorrow to try to run. 

Hope everyone has a great week.

smiley face day

1.  So the gold stars I was giving myself for not stress eating at work have turned into smiley faces.  The store I went to last night didn't have stars so this is what I have...

Kind of funny now the smiley days are also run days (the numbers at the bottom are the number of miles ran that day).  Running is a good motivator.

2.  Yesterday was supposed to be a 3 mile run day.  Since Work friend had to pick up her kid and I don't really want to spend anymore time at work then I have to, I decided to go to the reservoir AKA the res.  The res has a 2.6 mile loose small gravel track around it.  It was perfect weather so I ended up doing 2 laps and 5.1 miles.  I had a great time.  There were very few people there so I played spotify karaoke.  I feel sorry for those people who did pass me on the trail though.   

3.  I am really back in a running grove and have taken the time for some self reflection.  A few things I discovered
  a.  I hate my handheld amphipod, the rubber keeps coming off the bottom of it which makes is impossible to hold.  I almost threw it in the water several times yesterday.  I hate hydration belts, just can't stand the sloshing, makes me have to pee.  so when I got home I ordered this...

It's smaller than I am used to but I really like the thumb hold.  My hands are tiny so my only concern is that it might be a little big.  We will see soon.

 b. Songs make a huge difference in my running pace and intensity.  For example, Fun. We Are Young is the perfect tempo song for me.  I can pace myself to that song and run all day.  Godsmack Whatever is my angry song.  I run like a mad person during that song and could probably run a 5K to just that one song.  Anything longer and I would probably pass out.  I do love that song.

 c.  I am an interval runner.  I have tried both just running and doing intervals and I am faster with the short walk breaks.  Last night I did the first lap at run 1 walk 1 in the low 12's.  The second lap I did at 1:30 run 1 minute walk and ended up with a total overall pace of 12:40.  I never really felt tired so I don't think that was the case, I think it has a lot to do with the inappropriate Sinus Tachycardia.  My resting heart rate is about 100 and working out can easily get into the 200's.  For the first lap my heart rate stayed under 200 (even on my third mile, which was the fastest) but the second was all close to 210.  These are things that I have to remind myself when people say that people who run intervals aren't "real" runners.

 d.  If I didn't run I would be on a pantry full of mood altering anxiety meds.  I can tell such a difference in my attitude when I don't move.

4.  I broke down and ordered some from the Skirt Sports sale.  I love their running skirts, they have plenty of pockets.  I ended up getting two skirts and two tank tops.  The tanks have a hidden pocket on the inside "cleavage" area.  I could have done a lot of damage but I limited myself to buying only things with pockets and tried to keep is as close to $100 as possible.  I am so excited to be able to wear them.

5.  For some really strange reason I am in a music funk.  I don't listen to country music at all, but I had a time in the 90's that me and a friend would go dancing and of course got to where we liked some of the 90's country music.  I am building a country playlist in spotify and have been listening to 90's country on Pandora.  I am getting some strange looks.  It isn't Godsmack, lol.

6.  Dennis is in trouble.  I hate how people think that just because we don't have "real"kids that we can spend countless hours on things that they are just way too busy for.  The current project is some stupid tower trailer for his ham radio club (yep, he is a geek).  He has literally stayed at work until after 8 every night this week to fix it.  No one has even offered to come and help him.  I am so freaking irritated at this point.  I am normally pretty laid back about this kind of stuff but I am going through a work crisis and it would be nice to have my support system there for me.  He doesn't really understand because I am so laid back and we do have our separate hobbies.  He promised me this morning that Sunday we will spend the day together.  He better hope to god that trailer doesn't come up or I will hook up to that thing and drive it into the water somewhere.  I don't normally like to do a lot on Sunday's.  It is usually a rest day for me and I sit around and catch up on my DVR and spend quality time with the best dogs in the universe.  But this Sunday we will do something by god, I just got to figure out what.  

7.  I thought I was finished taking leave for awhile, but I called my eye doctor today and told him I was having problems with my contacts and just wanted a copy of my prescription to take to eyemart until my eyes start being normal again.  Well it turns out my script was written in 2010.  I have an appointment to see him March 17 at 1.  I am also going to see Dr. A that day at 5.  They are having a seminar at 6 and they want me to stay and tell my story.  Even though I don't feel it, Dr. A says I am still his star patient.

8.  I sent an email to Oklahoma State University yesterday to see if they would work with me on getting my Master's in Nutritional Science.  What I hope they can do is let me take what is absolutely necessary from the undergrad program and let me start on the Master's portion.  I haven't heard back from them so we will see.  That might make it a little bit harder but then again I have real life experience so that might be enough.  I just want to get started already.

9.  I signed up for  the Saint Patrick Day 5K this morning.  It is on the 16th and the Snake Run is on the 17th.  I still haven't decided if I want to do that one.  I probably won't decide until the week of.  I just don't do muddy trail runs.  If the ground is dry I am in and will do the 3 hour option and help out with the last 3 hours.  They also have a new run in May that is a three day run, 25K the first day, 50K the second, and 25K the third.  In my dreams I could totally do this but reality she is a bitch.  I did sign up to help.

10.  I probably need to get some work done since I am on the brink of failure and all.  I am seriously just in the mood to tell everyone to kiss my ass with a smile on my face.  Maybe I need to decrease my med, lol

no gold star yesterday

I didn't earn my gold star yesterday (I get a gold star everyday I go without visting the office candy jar, or for now a star drawn with a brown sharpie) They always bring snacks in to these 3 hour long meetings and I swear there was a mini twix just daring me to eat it during the entire meeting. I almost made it too. I was getting aggravated at my supervisor and co-lead answering questions for me when they weren't involved in the projects. The information they had they got from me!! I wanted to tell them that I didn't need their help making me look like an incompetent idiot. Instead I ate the damn candy bar. After that all bets were off; a mini snickers, 3 musketeer and m&ms also meet a tragic fate at my doing. Oh well. I will get my gold star today. Oh, yeah, remind me to go buy gold stars,

No work out last night. I had my nails done saturday and my thumb was starting to peal. I was so concerned I would forget to stop by and get the nail fixed that I forgot my running bag at work. Today is supposed to be a nice day so I will get it in today. I need to start doing some treadmill speed work again too.

Speaking of getting my nails done, I went in on a groupon and really liked this lady, she did a great job and offers fills for shilac nails at a much cheaper price. I have never seen anyone do that before. She seemed nice and offers appointments online, which I love. Well as I was there yesterday she started talking about "black helicopters" flying around doing urban assault training. I told her that Tulsa County has a black helicopter, I know this for a fact because we got to go up in it and take pictures for a photography class. But nope, these are UN helicopters practicing for the Government take over and that they have been spotted in Texas and Florida and it is just a sign of the end times . She then starts talking about how the holy spirit told her that the Hoover Dam would be the next thing to be targeted and it wouldn't be a natural disaster or terrorists, it would be an inside job like the twin towers. I almost got up and walked out with my wet nails. Crap, now I have to find another nail lady because I can't listen to that bat crazy crap. I almost asked her if she knew I worked for the federal government, I could be in on all of this and I would never tell. The nail lady is know known as Jessie Ventura.

I am eating peanut butter for breakfast but keeping in mind that there is probably close to 180 calories in two spoon fulls. NO MORE HALF A JAR SNACK. As a matter of fact, on more spoonful and it goes back in my drawer. I am trying to limit the PB consumption to pre-run fuel.

I have looked more into the going back to school thing. Oklahoma State has a couple of programs I am really interested in Community Nutrition and Nutrition or Dietetics and Exercise with a minor in Nutritional Sciences. The college campus is about an hour and a half away and I don't know if I could handle the stress of a commute like that on top of a stressful full time job. I need to call or email and find out if they offer enough of the classes online that I could do the majority of it there and if some of the classes might be offered at the Tulsa campus. The Master's program is offered online but since my degree is in Environmental Science I don't think that would help me out much. OU offers a program too but it isn't exactly what I want and again, it doesn't look like it is offered online. I also need to look into financial aid, which I don't think I could get and scholarships for old people. It has been so long since I have done this I am sure I will have to get help from some of the young yipper snappers in my office. The more I think about it the more excited I get.  Anyone information on locating scholarships would be greatly appreciated.

Baby steps

I really want to thank everyone who has offered their support and comments on my whoa is me blogs the last few weeks.  I am really trying to force myself into a better place.  Ya know, fake it 'til ya make it. 

I had a pretty good weekend.  Saturday was pretty much all about me.  I had my nails done, got my hair trimmed and touched up, bought that sweater I have had my eye on for months.  Start the month off right. 

Yesterday turned out to be super busy.  I had to take off early to get Hunter to the vet to get his arthritis shot.  Dennis usually takes him but he has screwed his schedule up because of the stupid radio club (I am about to throw a tantrum about the stupid radio club btw) so I had to take off work to get Hunt to the vet to keep him on schedule.  I also had to take him to his regular vet to get his proheart shot because they were out last week.  While I was out I stopped and mailed a care package off to Jennifer and got a few pairs of jeans hemmed that I have had sitting around my house.  The sad thing about the jeans is, one pair I can't get buttoned now.  I have to stop being a food vacuum. 
I dropped Hunter's pain medication prescription off at the pharmacy and went for a run around the reservoir a couple of miles away.  It was hot, like in the 70's so my pace was a lot slower than normal.  Funny thing is, in a few months the 70's will be a cold front.

Anyway, I got a lot done yesterday and even made time for a little exercise.  The plan is to either run on the treadmill or do the recumbent bike tonight.  I brought my stuff to work so I might break down and just go downstairs and do it.

I know this sounds crazy but I have a real desire to go back to school and get a degree in nutrition.  I think it is very interesting and I don't know of very many that have actually gone through serious weight issues and/or WLS.  I have started to look at some schools but can't find anything local.  I could do it online but would have to pay the outrageous out of state tuition.  I need to do some more research and find some scholarships.  I do have my Masters in Environmental Science so I am not sure what I would be able to use towards this degree.  Probably only the basics is what I am thinking, have to start with the B.S. but heck, at least the boring part is out of the way.  I know this might just be me deflecting since I am so unhappy with my job right now.  Although I have thought about this a lot, I may look at you like you have two heads if you remind me I thought about doing this in a month or so.  Plus, I don't think I could ever leave my "cushy" government job but I could do something on weekends and evenings since most people work.  I think I just miss the feeling of school being the most stressful thing in my life.

As far as junk food goes, I have done pretty good.  No easter candy at work on Friday or yesterday.  We had program yesterday with cake and I took a piece, ate three bites and threw it away.  We are having a staff meeting this morning and people have a really bad habit of bringing snacks.  I am going to go fill up my water bottle and sit as far away from the shit as I can. 

One day at a time.  I really need to order some gold stars to put on my calendar.