I'm still alive

Just a quick check in to let you guys know I am still around. I really appreciate all of your comments. My dogs are like my kids and I feel like I am losing a part of me. It helps to know there are people who care.

Dexter is not doing well, he is getting weaker by the day. He still jumps in bed for cuddles though. He is still eating but I don't think his body is processing the food he is still losing weight. He always follows me when I go into the kitchen and sits in a corner by the pantry, last night he fell twice on the tile. I really don't have a good feeling about today. I went to a grief counselor yesterday and that was a colossal waste of time. Dennis asked me what I expected and I thought at least she would tell me to journal or give me some kind of workbook, suggest a book to read....something. A pill that would make me numb would be nice. I literally cry everyday. Heck I am crying right now.

My weight is up, yesterday I was at 118. Lots of stress eating and mindless noshing. It doesn't help that I drive through and get Dexter a double cheeseburger from McD's for lunch everyday so since I am there and all...

The results from my UGI biopsy came back clear. I am supposed to stay on the prescription strength Prilosec for 6 weeks. I can't really tell a difference, as a matter of fact I kind of stopped taking it because I didn't feel like I needed it anymore.

The band doctor told me I had to wait a month from the test to get another fill. I know I will lose the stress/grief weight once I get my fill level up. Right now the appointment is June 3rd but I am on the cancellation list.

Last but not least, the sewer at my house is messed up. It backed up into my bathroom, which was so freaking gross. Dennis pulled the toilet and ran some machine down the line last night but it didn't work. The city is going to come out today and try it from their end. In the meantime I am coming to work early and taking a shower and getting ready in the locker room. Dennis told me I should get a hotel room but I am not going to leave Dexter and he can't handle going to the hotel with me. So, we are living "wilderness" style. It reminds me of a quote from the movie UP....best movie ever...
Mr. Fredricksen? Am I supposed to dig the hole before or after? Oh, It's before....
Seriously, we have a QuickTrip about a mile away so if you really have to go there is a clean restroom close.

I do have my fingers crossed that when I get home the city will have found and fixed the problem!!!

I will leave you with some of my daily Dexter pictures I have been taking...

Sunday morning cuddles

For some reason Dennis thought it was a good idea to take a picture of us when I am bawling my eyes out.

Dennis' birthday was Friday.  I asked him what he wanted and he said he just wanted to spend time with our baby boy.