More pictures

one day at a time

My weight was way freaking up again today for some reason.  Seriously I have no clue what is going on.  The fill monday is looking better and better.

I go back to the doctor for my leg today.  It is much better.  Last night we went for a short walk around the neighborhood and had no pain at all; this morning it was just a little stiff.  I figure that is to be expected.  It hasn't been wrapped since Sunday.

I decided yesterday that I wanted to have a get together with my running friends the day before my birthday as a kind of "good bye to my 30's" party.  I want to spend my birthday with my SO but it will probably be the night before that it finally hits me that I will be old the next day, lol.  So I sent out a good ole facebook invite.  Not sure if anyone will come but it is better then sitting at my house dwelling on something that I can't change.

In other exciting new I have decided I am going to dress up like a minion for halloween.  I am going to hit up goodwill this weekend in search of overalls and a yellow hoodie.  I may have to settle for a yellow shirt which I know I can find at walmart or target but the hoodie is best for the costume.  I may have to take a long lunch and see if Big Lots has anything.

daily lessons

I am still in my funk but I am trying really hard to fake it, I'm a girl that should be easy right :-) 

My leg is getting better, I no longer have intense pain, it is just a dull throb.  I go back and have acupuncture again tomorrow, probably have it wrapped one more time.  I am going to be able to walk soon, maybe by the first of next week. 

One of my friends sent me a text last night and asked me when I had my band surgery because she had another friend that had been banded.  It hit me it has been almost 4 months since my surgery.  I have lost 20 pounds.  The friend has lost 25 pounds since October.  At first I was really upset about this but I have lost 20 pounds.  This is huge for me.  I was one of those people that would work out all the time, eat right 99% of the time and maintain.  I was a low BMI candidate, my starting BMI was 31.4, my current BMI is 27.6; very close to "normal".  Would I complain about losing 25 pounds in a month?  Nope but I am not that person.  I have another fill scheduled for Monday and I am not 100% sure I want a fill.  I think I am at a good spot right now.  Once I start working out again I think the weight will slowly start to come off again.

I am trying really hard to focus on my journey and not compare to other people.  It's a process.

feeling down

I am sure the lack of exercise is finally starting to make me super cranky.  I am just in a blah mood and have no desire to even crawl out of this little whole.  It is bad enough that my weight was up two whole pounds today and I just didn't even care. 

I have had my leg taped up for the last two weeks but for some reason it didn't stick as well this week as it did last week.  I asked Dennis to trim up some of the ends that were coming loose and he freaking cut my leg with the scissors.  When I yelled out he said he didn't see any blood so I made him take the wrap off to prove that he cut me.  Now I have no wrap on my leg and I am prety sure the swelling is up as a result, I am going to pretend that is where the two pounds are coming from. 

My birthday is 15 days away and I had planned on a shopping trip to the new outlet mall in OKC with a friend but it seems as if today was the day my television decided to die.  There goes the birthday trip.  I just hope it doesn't effect my plans to go to London.  Those suckers are not cheap.  I may just get the little 20 inch out of the bedroom and see what black friday has to offer. 

I go back to the doctor on Wednesday but my leg is still bruised and the knot is still there so I am sure I will be told no exercise for another week.  I know I could do a little bit of upper body but you would be suprised what little you can do.  Most moves engage the hamstring enough to cause tightness if not outright pain. 

Monday is fill day.  I have mixed fellings about getting a fill.  I am down 5 pounds from my last visit, since my birthday is a week after the visit I would kind of like him to take some out and go back after my birthday and put it plus a little back in.  I just want to enjoy my birthday dinner without the fear of PBing a nice dinner all over the table.  Then again I don't want to gain any weight back either.  Hum, decisions decision.

We went out to eat last night and I ate almost an entire burrito, WTF?  I didn't think that was even possible.  I was too scared to weigh this morning since I hit a low of 156 yesterday.

And just because my band is a fickle sort milk is making me want to PB this morning.  MILK?  I ate my normal cream of wheat waited about 20 minutes and tried to take a drink of milk and it wanted to come up really bad. 

scale suprises!!

I decided I wasn't going to weigh this morning, I just had a feeling it would not be pretty with the combination of no exercise and the inflamation from my torn hammy.  But purely out of habit I jumped on the scale this morning and was rewarded with 156.8!!!   I sure hope it is a real loss and not muscle from nearly a week of no movement.  At any rate I am going to take it anyway!!

I go back to the doctor Thursday to have accupuncture done on my leg and get it re-taped.  It honestly feels better today, only excruciating pain when I have to sit in a lower chair, this includes the toilet so I can only imagine what people think when I make the omg that hurts noise as I sit down and stand up. 

Going out to eat with the man tonight.  Mexican, yummo!!

sport injuries suck

I have a grade 2 hamstring strain.  To be honest I didn't go to the orthopedic doctor because I knew they would put me on crutches ( I had a stress fracture in my knee three years ago and was on crutches for three months.  Don't care to repeat that).  My chiropractor is an amazing athlete who I have lots of faith in when it comes to sports injuries; he did acupuncture on it and taped me up with k-tape.  I go back Thursday so he can look at it and retape it.  No exercise that puts any strain on my hamstring, heck standing up and setting down hurts.  At first he told me I could bike but he changed his mind after he saw how bad it was and doesn't want me to rupture it.  Almost worth it though because Dr. Z told me he could really tell I was firming up and looking really good.  He asked me if I had a lot of people telling me because it was really noticeable.  I heart Dr. Z, lol

It was really kind of funny this weekend when I helped run an aid station at a 50K, 100K, and 100 mile run.  These poor guys and girls that had ran 95 miles would come up to the aid station and I would yell out in pain standing up from my comfy chair.  In my defense I did stay awake over 30 hours tending to my station.  Some of those guys are nuts.  One guy was doing his 3rd 100 mile run in 4 weeks; I talked to him a few minutes and he had gastric bypass and had lost over 100 pounds.  If that isn't motivating I don't know what is.  I can honestly say that I will never run 100 miles though, no desire whatsoever!!

My personal trainer is about to get fired I think.  My leg has been hurting for over a week.  I went him a text on my Tuesday workout and told him that I was hurt and he would have to go easy on me.  He promised he would.  We foam rolled my leg and he had me do a lot of upper body circuits, but there were still some things that hurt my leg that he had me push through.  The second part of the workout he had me running with weights in my hand and running stairs with a medicine ball.  I sent him a text today and told him I had to take a week off and he sent me a text back telling me I needed to come in anyway and do upper body.  I told him that I am not going to fall for that again and I wasn't going to have him push me through things that could rupture my hamstring since he obviously didn't understand how bad it was.  I sent him a message later with a picture of my taped up leg and he told me that I still needed to come in and work out with him and do upper body.  I told him I would do it on my own.  He didn't reply.  The more I think about it the more pissed off I get that he had me doing leg lifts and running stairs when he saw how much pain I am in.  I would tell the manager but he IS the manager.  I have a feeling he is putting a lot of pressure on me because I am losing quickly and my body is really firming up and he wants people to see me and think it is all him.  I have 6 or 7 sessions left and I am not going to buy more sessions.  I know weight training is important but I am ready to start focusing on running.

I got new running shoes today before I found out I couldn't even walk :(  On top of that the weather is going to be amazing this week :( :(

Back to work and the real world tomorrow.  Maybe I can get some rest....